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Group: Nashville, Tennessee

Teacher: HAM


May 3, 2001

Ham: Greetings, children, I am Ham and I am happy that you have come tonight for this discussion. Tonight, let us again discuss the value of true friendship. Loving your neighbor, your friends, is a necessary and important experience in living. Many people sadly gradually withdraw from social contact claiming not to have the time or not to have the inclination to make new acquaintances into friends. The Urantia book states that if you love only those who love you, then you are destined to lead a very mean and narrow life.

We have discussed openness toward the Father's spirit, now we must discuss openness toward your brethren. Remember that people are very tender creatures, they are easily wounded and a single unthinking remark can damage one of these tender creatures for a life time. You mortals make a big show of being tough and of being able to take rough treatment. But, even the most blustery among you has very tender feelings and it is very important that when you interact with someone that you remember to treat each person with extraordinary tenderness. In doing this, it allows the Father's spirit to come through you and to touch another person.

The spirit of God is very, very sensitive, very tender. He is easily blocked by an angry thought or any type of social posturing which puts up a wall between yourself and another. When the Father asks you to feed his sheep, so to speak, to nourish the spirits of his children, he asks that you pick very tender grass and give it lovingly.

So many mortals make a business of spreading the word or preaching the word and do it in a very forceful way as though the spirit of God were a thundering presence, as though they were afraid of being unsure. Certainty about God does not require a blustery performance. Certainty does not require pounding the table and raising one's voice. Those who are truly certain of God allow their hearts to be tender and are not so forceful in presenting him to others because he is not forceful when he presents himself to you.

Inner certainty, inner peace with God, does not require one to act any certain way but he does require that you be tender with his children. Humans often adopt forceful tones and sure and certain attitudes out of the mistaken notion that that attitude portrays certainty, an inner sureness. But, the Father who sees the entire person sees rather someone who is pretending to be sure and certain.

So, when you encounter such people who want such certainty so desperately, allow your hearts to be softened, allow yourselves to be understanding as the Father is. You do not need to adopt the same tone and fire right back, so to speak. For this type of striving accomplishes nothing. The wisest men always preface their comments with qualifiers which denote an uncertainty. Everyone is uncertain so when you say I really don't know but could it be... then the other person is receptive and you can offer the tender grass and it will be received. It never works to pick up the thistles and thorns of absolutism and try to shove that down the throats of someone who is not inclined to take it.

When you accept your sonship with God, when you accept all that that entails, you become an ambassador not for a creed or a code but for him personally. The tender love that he give to your heart must then be given to other hearts through you. There is a great difference between men who know God and men who profess to know about God. Theology matters very little to one who walks with him daily.

Value your friendships. Allow your tender hearts to mingle, to know each other. Put away pride, put away affectation. Be for a little while two creatures who know very little but who share a love for each other without a lot of baggage. . . . . [Editor: Personal Messages Removed]