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Group: Nashville, Tennessee

Teacher: HAM

Topic: Wedding Oneself To Spirit

September 26, 1999

Ham: Greetings, children, I am Ham and I want to thank you each for coming here tonight. This evening, we shall discuss the process of wedding oneself with one's inner spirit.

The human mortal mind begins very far from the adjuster's consciousness or consciousness of the adjuster. You begin life and consciousness is born as awareness of material reality. As you grow, but still as a small child, the dream life and conscious life are somewhat melded. So, a child's fantasy life is very real and very rich. Eventually, there comes a point when you as a child realized that the material world was more real, more important, than the fantasy life and you gradually let go of the dream fantasy world in favor of the world of material reality.

This is usually around the time when moral decisions begin. You as a child, at one time, made a choice between the purely selfish and the understanding of another person or another being that made you feel compassion for that person or being. Often times with children, this decision involves a family pet, but it is always another living thing. This is your first feeling of compassion for another, the first time you were able to project the "I" into the "you" and it is in that moment of realization that the adjuster takes up his long residence and begins the slow process of wooing the human mind.

The adjuster is pure love. He is purely feeling everything you feel, projecting the I that he is into the you that you are at all times. This is often referred to as a love affair, the process by which you gradually give up the selfishness and the self-centeredness that you were born with allowing him to invade your consciousness and to project the love that he feels for you and for all living things. You cannot feel the love of God without simultaneously feeling love for other beings. Likewise, when you reject feelings of love for a person, you reject that part of God that is projecting love to you and through you.

Often in this class, we have spoken of acceptance. The simple acceptance of the Father's love. Tonight, we will speak of actively loving the Father for the more you actively love him, projecting love toward him, the more he will reveal himself to you, the more you will come to know God and it is this process of you beginning to know him that is a gradual wedding of two beings becoming one.

In fact, and in truth, you are all betrothed to the Father. You are all undergoing a process of opening yourselves to love and of learning to love him. When you actively make the decision to love God, and you love him with all your heart and all your mind, soon you will find yourself becoming more like him and this is how you get to know the Father, you partake of his goodness, of his righteousness, his love, and compassion. And, as you do this, gradually you must let go of the old selfishness, the old struggle with the world that you are all engaged in. Gradually, you let go of material concerns and are instead focused on concerns for other people.

As you love God, you begin to partake of his joy and so gradually you begin to let go of those things that are not joyful, that do not bring you joy. And you find that joy is only found in the loving communion of hearts.

As you grow to love God, gradually you begin, in baby steps, to partake of his wisdom. Wisdom begins with self-control. Self-control is denial of selfishness. It is selfishness that causes the grasping nature, the fear, that you won't have enough time, that someone will get more than you, that there won't be enough left. It is selfishness that causes all manner of rudeness, and wisdom, in partaking of the divine nature, that allows grace and good humor. Many so-called accidents are warnings that you do not have enough self-control. They are the seraphim's way of nudging you toward God.

You should all be much more at ease. Practice the stillness and in that stillness time practice loving the Father. Practice giving yourself to him actively. Then, much of the pressure of daily life will begin to lift. Are there any questions?

Q: Could I have a personal message please?

Ham: Naturally, son. Fear not for all is well and as it should be. Do not allow impatience to disrupt the natural outworking that the seraphim have set for you. In fact, I would advise more patience for all of you, more relaxation. Son, you have much potential that is impeded by a kind of nagging fear and of course this is a common difficulty. Be aware that you do have time to take time outs with God as Jesus did. It is good to talk things over with him and it is good to love him. Both these things will help you. Yes, remember to take time outs with God.

Q: We have a question from Charlie B. Ever since Ham has informed me that I made it to the third psychic circle but the Urantia book doesn't help much. Could he give a brief explanation of the circles like what we have to achieve and what we might expect as we move from the first circle to the first?Ham: It is difficult to give hard and fast rules or sign posts that you should watch for because each person is unique and therefore their morontia progress is unique. Achieving the third circle is the beginning of your true betrothal with the adjuster. With the 3rd circle, promises have been made on both sides and these promises are eternal. This is the truly important step. Everything after is simply levels of what the Urantia book calls integration, that is integrating the mindal, spiritual, morontial, and physical life. Even those who have reached the first circle are only beginning this process and the adjuster's voice is still very rare. The first circle is at least as involved as all the other circles combined. So think of these things, these levels of achievement, as your first baby steps on the eternal journey toward Paradise. I only answer these questions because I know there is great curiosity among Urantia book readers, but be assured all these steps are gradual and easy. They are all very natural and part of your growth.

Q: Is there any way for us to know when we have achieved the second circle in other words is there any significant event that occurs in our lives to let us know that we have made it?

Ham: Every person is different, but as a rule no, there is no special sign post.

Q: I didn't understand what you meant by the accidents being a way that the seraphim have or moving you towards God. Can you give an example that might make that more understandable?

Ham: Yes, often human accidents are caused by human error and human error is often caused by impatience, frustration, anger, or intolerance. In other words, if you are partaking of spirit poisons, these often put you in dangerous situations. All of you have certainly experienced a time when you have injured yourselves in a moment of frustration or anger. A person who is habitually angry and is habitually partaking of this spirit poison, is less in control of his actions and is more likely in a dangerous situation, one that can cause harm to himself or others, than a person who is always partaking of joy and the peace of the Father's love. And, yes, sometimes even having a pair of guardian seraphim will not protect you from accidents in which you have partaken of the poisons of impatience or anger. A small accident may warn you of a larger accident to come. Is this clear?

Q: What is the role of the seraphim, do they use the accident you have created as an occasion to nudge you towards God?

Ham: No, they allow the accident to happen and this, in itself, often nudges people toward the Father.I want to be sure that I don't overgeneralize. That doesn't mean that every time I have an accident that I have been impatient, intolerant, etc.

Ham: No.

Q: I had a question that your lesson sparked. Do children sometimes have the ability to see spiritual beings and then lose that as the become more enmeshed in the world or is that more products of their imagination?

Ham: I would say that normally, but not always, the fantasy life of children is entirely products of the imagination. It is as though the dream life and the waking life are intermingled. Adults experience this very rarely, but in children their emotional states very much color the world and imaginary friends are often the beginning of the alter ego, the person you talk to when you talk to yourself.

Q: Ham, I want to go back to the discussion of accidents and ask if illness falls under the category of accidents nudging you.

Ham: Just like some accidents may be this kind of sign, some illnesses may be but not all.

Q: Illness is used as a nudge now and then isn't it?

Ham: yes.

Q: Do you have anything for Esmirelda?

Ham: Certainly, daughter. You are increasingly discovering joy, the joy of love especially. Allow this to continue opening your heart. You are making great spiritual progress, even though at times it doesn't seem like it, this is surely the case. Stillness, acceptance, and love – embrace these. You are doing very well.Q: Elena?

Ham: Daughter, you are finding much joy in friendships, and in discovering your creativity anew. Do not neglect your creative outlet for it is a source of much joy and inner contentment. Be at peace, you do well.

Q: Rebecca?

Ham: Daughter, you are finding this spiritual journey to have some difficult moments. Be aware that you are doing very well. Know that you are building character as you cleave to righteousness and strengthening inner purity. You do well daughter, fear not.

Q: Jarad?

Ham: Son, you do well. Be careful of indulging your selfishness like a child. Force your lower self, your selfish self, to grow up and stop giving in to it.

Q: The Binges?

Ham: There are other behaviors as well, impatience, lack of courtesy, lack of humility, discourteous driving, driving too fast, that kind of thing is childish and dangerous. You must control this impulse and grow in maturity for this is one example where accidents will surely happen. Is this helping?

Q: Do you mean driving too fast on trips?

Ham: No. I mean being in a hurry and being unthinking.

Q: By not paying attention?

Ham: Being unthinking of the other drivers.Q: I find that loving another person is easy because that person is right there and I can hear and feel and touch and see them. I find it hard to love God sometimes because it is more remote and abstract. Can you help me overcome this barrier?

Ham: Let me ask you, on a scale of 1-10, how much do you truly love yourself.

Q: I'm doing better than I used to and I'm about a 7 maybe.

Ham: Those remaining three points of hesitation are your blockage. As you begin more and more to love and accept yourself, you will begin to be more conscious of the divine love and then loving him back won't seem like such a stretch for he will feel much more near and much more an active participant in all you life. Have you done the mirror exercise?

Q: I was told, and I don't think I complied with it very well.

Ham: This helps you to overcome that blockage. Look at yourself in the mirror and say to yourself, "I love you, you are wonderful just the way you are". Do this every day this week and we will discuss it next week. Any others who are feeling blocked in the areas of self-love and self-acceptance, do this as well. If you have trouble looking yourself in the eye and saying "I love you, you are wonderful", if this causes you to laugh or causes you discomfort, you know there is a ways to go.

Q: Ham, I would like to take this opportunity to thank you and I have seen a huge change in my life since we started the lessons so I wanted to say thank you and ask if you have a personal message for me this evening?

Ham: Thank you my daughter for allowing me this opportunity to be an influence in your life. I am very grateful for your diligence, your concentration, and your attention to my words. Though you have had some rocky times in childhood and you had moments of deeply questioning the universe and its benevolence, now you have come to a point where you can accept reality and accept that you are loved and that you are safe. Indeed, you are coming to accept your place in the universe and your connection with the Father. Allow the Father's love to embrace and overwhelm and overshadow the earthly love you received from your earthly father, that is allow your real Father to fill in all the gaps, to comfort and assuage the old wounds, to merge with yet overwhelm your earthly father's love. This will give you that sense of security and belonging that you crave.

Q: Ham do you have a personal message for me tonight?

Ham: Certainly, son. You have come far in self-acceptance, but naturally, it is still difficult to accept your father and his imperfect love and this is impeding your own self- acceptance. So again, allow the Father's love, your real Father's love, to merge with that small and imperfect love that your father was able to give you. Allow the Father's perfect love to heal and to replace those areas where love was missing. Know that you are a beloved child of the infinite, eternal God. You are loved just as much as if you were his only son. As you grow in your acceptance of his love, you will grow in your ability to accept others and to accept their love, however imperfect it may be, for his perfect love makes up for all the rest.

Q: Ham do you have a personal message for me tonight please?

Ham: Yes, son. You are making good steady progress. There is nothing holding you back or impeding you in your spiritual quest except illusion. Fear is an illusion, loneliness is an illusion, feeling misunderstood is an illusion. I know that you are always thinking of the higher, spiritual way and that you are truly trying to walk a higher path and to live an ever more righteous life. Relax, allow yourself time for refreshing the spirit with humor. The Master said once that life is like a bridge from one existence to the next. It is not wise to try to build a home on it. That means there is nothing worth holding on to. Everything changes, so walk forward without fear and be happy.

Q: May I have a personal message?

Ham: Certainly son. You likewise fight battles with illusions. The dreaded "what if" that never materializes still haunts you and you should be aware of this. Practice being in the now, practice the mirror exercise. You must come to a point where you are ready to give up your fears for in a strange way, these fears are a comfort. So, like a child who is gradually weaned, you must learn to enjoy the solid foods of existence, the realities of love and joy and happiness. Letting go of the child's security blanket that serves no purpose. Have you practiced the mirror exercise?

Q: I have in the past?Ham: Did you make progress?

Q: I think so, yes.

Ham: I want everybody to do this exercise every day this week. For those of you who have done it in the past, see if you have made progress in the mean time and even if it is easy the first couple of days, keep doing it because you'll likely find a difficulty at some point. This is an exercise designed to bring things to the surface. It's a cleansing exercise.

Q: Do you have a message for me Ham?

Ham: Certainly, son. You are making some radical readjustments. You are turning from a certain selfishness that was disguised to a more honest and ennobling attitude that that is strengthening your inner core character. You are finding some peace, some tranquility in the stillness. This is giving you a tool for coping with stress that was very much necessary. You need also, perhaps, some other ways to help you reduce your stress besides artificial means. Exercise, enjoyment with friends, more socialization. Don't worry so much about getting things done as just living in the day. Is this helping?

Q: Yes, and I want to thank you for your help in the last 3-4 weeks, it has been a big catalyst for some changes.

Ham: I am grateful to be of some service.

Q: I know that Brodan said he loved himself about a seven, you know what is deep inside of us, would you say that I love myself about a 2 or a 3?

Ham: I am more interested in your perception.

Q: I was just wondering... that is my guess about it, but I don't know if I really think that or if that was a bullet.. So I was asking, what is the real answer?Ham: 3 with a bullet

Farewell until next week, my love and my prayers are with you.