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Group: Nashville, Tennessee

Teacher: HAM


September 19, 1999

Ham: Greetings, children, I am Ham and I am happy that you have come again this evening. Our lesson is concerning reflection. Much of modern life is so hurried , so filled with activity, that there is no time for meditative reflection upon one's life or one's work. This is a shame.

Often we observe that you have some time for reflection before or during your stillness time and this is good. In order to grow and learn from experience, it is essential that you have time to reflect upon your experiences, to think about them and their deeper meanings without hurry or stress,

What does it all mean? What does working every day mean in the greater context of my eternal life? How do the various phases of my life point in new directions. Where have I made mistakes? And, most importantly, have I forgiven myself my mistakes or are they festering in my subconscious producing guilt?

All these things require a certain amount of time. Daily life, for most people, is rushed and when you do relax, you do so in front of a television set so that your time of just being, sitting with your own thoughts, is very limited. It is good to have entertainment, to have relaxation with friends, but it is also good to have some quiet time alone even if it is only a few hours once a week when you can be in your own space and think your own thoughts without interference for 2 or 3 hours.

It is important for your sense of grounding that you allow yourself this time. Without it, you are liable to feel that you life is out of your control, that you are not fully participating in everything you are just on remote control, automatic pilot. Many people feel so tired and exhausted that their lives don't feel like they are their own as if they are being pushed and pulled in many directions and no direction at once.

Most of you here, however, do have time but you seldom allow it for yourselves anyway. You spend time worrying about trivial things, you spend time watching television, or doing little chores that take up precious reflection time. Now, when you have this time, use it wisely. Think things over, Become at peace with yourselves so that what you do is by choice in life not by force.

The person you are today is partly made up of all the people you have been in the past, all the decisions you have made, all the knowledge you sought, and that which you rejected. Much of this life was done in a hurried blur, a rush of expectations, pressures, that you put upon yourselves.Jesus, when he was a small boy, had much time to ponder his reality. He had time to think about how things were and how they should be instead of rushing through and accepting everything without thinking through it. If your parents had ever told you, or if you had ever told your child, "I don't know, it's just the way it is, period". That is a sign of a hurried parent forgetting the needs of a reflective child.

A child asks why about everything. As a child grows and begins accepting everything the way it is, without question, he loses his sense of wonder as well as his sense of fairness and accepts the status quo without question and just does his best to get by like everybody else. Those who keep asking why are those who give to society, who can dare to imagine things being different. They are the people who challenge the rest of society to question. Maybe this can be better? Maybe the world can be a better place?

So, take your reflection time, think about things. Think about who you are and how the world is, how society is, how nature is, and ask why. Don't give up on the big questions, leaving them for others. The big questions are yours, the big questions belong to everyone. The wonder of life need not be pushed aside and trampled under food in the rush to conformity. Take a step back and reclaim the wonder you felt as a child at the world. Reclaim the why's. Are there any questions at this time?

Q: What about using times when you are traveling and driving to do some reflection.

Ham: Certainly, yes, and in fact this is somewhat of a forced reflection time. Often, people will not reflect unless there is absolutely nothing else to do.

Q: I was walking today and found myself deepening into reflection. I assume the important thing is to reflect and not so much that you set aside 2-3 hours with nothing to do?

Ham: Yes.

Q: I feel like I have the opposite problem and have too much time to reflect and feel like I have become ingrown with too much self-reflection and introspection and self- examination.

Ham: This is a preparing time for you child. You are preparing to meet challenges that are coming to you and you have needed this time for this purpose. Fear not, none is ever too ready when the Father calls.Q: Ham, instead of a personal message, I want to ask what can I do differently?

Ham: Yes, that old proverb, "whatsoever they hand finds to do, do that with all thy might" would be wise for you. Do not allow the pressing needs of the moment to dissuade you from larger goals. Focus on the larger thing and the small things will come and be settled on their own. Is this helping?

Q: Ham, can I have some feedback from you this week please?

Ham: Certainly, son. The love is growing within you as you open yourself to love. You are growing in self-awareness and self-confidence. You are learning that confidence comes not so much with settled ideas as with a determination to place your whole faith and your whole hearted love with the Father in Heaven. You are learning how best to minister to your charges as well and yet your responsibility feels lighter and less burdensome than ever before. Your steadfastness and determination will bear fruit and your life will grow a bit easier than it has been. You are growing in peace within yourself and this is good.

Q: Ham, Do you have a message for Charlie B?

Ham: Certainly, son. Your heart is steadfast and you have made the determination to whole-heartedly try to reach or work toward the Father in Heaven. Be assured, your struggle is won. He is close beside you and the barriers between you and he are softening. Be assured that the Master himself takes your hand and pulls you to his breast like a child so that you may receive his comfort. Be not dismayed by the order of the universe. It is ordered for you so that you may be ministered to perfectly. Do not worry about your family. Adjustments are ongoing within any family unit as the children grow and change and as the parents grow spiritually. Adjustments will be inevitable but remember that is all they are and all is well.

Q: Do you have anything for Esmirleda?

Ham: Yes. Daughter, reach into your heart in gratitude and love. Allow the Father's love to shine through you so that others may be warmed and comforted as you have been. Peace be with you. Follow the path of love and rejoice in the Master's gentle guidance.

Q: Elena?Ham: Daughter, you have made some great changes in your life and there are changes within also to be coming. Loving yourself completely and unreservedly as you are will come to you. Give yourself over increasingly to love and all the jagged ways will be smoothed and that which is difficult will be easy.

Q: Rebecca?

Ham: Daughter, you do well. It is natural to feel somewhat anxious in anticipation of life's changes. But, be assured that these changes will be easy and effortless. There is no way so steep that the Father cannot help you up. Fear not, no harm can come to you. You are deserving of this time in life.

Q: Jarad?

Ham: Son, you do well. Be at ease. Do not feel that you have not done all you can for you continually make strides and overcome obstacles and are showing great courage in many ways. Fear not, many things will be changing soon and you are well prepared to meet new challenges and new opportunities. You do well son, go in peace.

Q: Ham, I would appreciate a message tonight please.

Ham: I would ask you how did your mirror exercise work?

Q: Well I did it a couple times this week, I'm sure not as much as I need to.

Ham: Is it easy or difficult?

Q: It is difficult. I find that I don't believe myself. I guess that is the feeling.

Ham: Continue with this exercise every day even though it feels silly or strange. Keep doing it and we will speak about it again some more when we meet again.Q: OK. Thank you.

Ham: You are very welcome son, you do well.

Amalian, you do well my daughter. You have faced many challenges with courage and fortitude. You have not shrunk from self-examination no matter where this journey took you and this is an inspiration to others as well. You are gaining greater peace and greater courage and inner strength every day. Do not feel discouraged for in our eyes you are doing wonderfully and we are very happy with your rapid progress. Continue, therefore, in preparation and you do well.

Q: Thank you Ham. I missed you too.

Ham: I was with you on several occasions as always. I personally observe all my students many times during the week and I am aware of the pure essence, the inner heart, of each one of you always. Until next week, my love and my prayers are with you each one.