CENTER FOR CHRIST CONSCIOUSNESS
MOTHER SPIRIT NEBADONIA
Exercise of Beaming Father’s Love Into Others
Releasing Annoyances From Selves
Prayer: Mother and Father, we thank you for this opportunity once again to gather in your presence. Open us, fill us with your love that heals and knits us into your image. We are so humbly and deeply grateful. Receive our appreciation and thanks. Amen.
Good evening, my beloved children. This is your Mother Nebadonia who speaks. Over the last several weeks we had begun to open your minds to a greater awareness of ministering your Father’s love to our children. Tonight, after this lesson and experience, I would ask that you share with one another the experiences and the attempts you have made in beaming your Father’s love into your brothers and sisters. There will be many who will be witnessing your discussion. And you will also be impressed with other ideas to consider as you share these experiences with one another.
For now, go within. Ask your Father to come forward in your mind’s eye. Feel his heart beat in unison with yours. Allow his hand to open your heart, the heart that wishes to share his love with your brothers and sisters. Feel your desire to share this more fully with them and notice where you feel resistance or tension. Ask for my breath to soften and help you yield to your Father’s love. Let us move in you now, children. (Pause)
Bring to us now your petty judgments and resentments and those traits that you find so irksome in your fellow brethren. Ask us to remove that which you find so annoying in others that is still within yourselves. Bring these to us now and we will help you step outside and into something better. (Pause)
What have you to lose in allowing these to be released from you? There is deep resistance to letting these go. Long have you struggled with them and yet they are still somewhat comfortable in you as a way of protecting yourself against injury and misperception. But clearly they have no purpose or use in you now. I ask you to offer them more fully to us. And so your mind is willing but yet there is something deeper in you that still resists. Let us come into this resistance, my children. We will open you and teach you our ways to perceive, to understand, and to love as we love. (Pause)
The years of judgment have been unkind in your body. They have turned you away from being in your Father’s presence and to receive more fully the breath of life that I bring into you. Tell your body that you no longer wish to hold onto them; that they are poison and you need the antidote of forgiveness and compassionate understanding. Allow us to come into your cells to release you from the years, habits, and inclinations towards judgment. (Pause)
In your mind’s eye, allow yourselves to sense an individual whom you have found particularly difficult to understand or forgive. Whether it is yourself or another person is not important. Simply acknowledge that you have judgment in the way from fully being able to see this individual. Ask your Father to come into your mind and heart with his love. Ask me to soften any judgment that you may perceive. (Pause)
As you perceive this individual and begin to feel the resistance in yourself softening and the desire to love and serve this individual grow, ask for your Father’s love to go into that place where this person is in pain. You will not necessarily know where that is, and it is not important that you do. Simply in your intention direct your thoughts towards this place where this person has been hurt. Project your feelings of compassion and love also into that place. Allow your Father and me to move in you now. (Pause)
Ask your Father to take your hands and to bring them into that individual’s heart center. It is not necessarily significant whether or not you sense this at this time. We are opening new doors within you to perceive what your brothers and sisters need. Simply offer your hands to your Father and ask your hands to be implanted in that person’s heart and to hold that individual’s heart with love and tenderness as you allow your Father’s love to flow, filling you, running through you and into that individual. (Pause)
Simply continue to stay in your intention to be a conduit of love and healing for this individual. Feel your desire for this person to grow strong and healthy in Michael’s love. As I move in this individual through you, sense your own strengthening. (Pause)
Finally, ask for my breath to knit you and this person into a deeper relationship, one where the defensiveness and judgments are yielded to mutual respect and understanding. Ask your Father to guide you to greater fraternal relations with this individual, that you are reflecting him in your thoughts and words to this individual as you interact. (Pause)
When you are ready bring to me your comments or questions about this evening’s experience and how to more graciously minister your Father’s love to your brothers and sisters.
Student: Mother, at the beginning of the exercise the person I was focusing on was me. But then I noticed that I wasn’t in as much emotional pain as I used to be. I changed focus to a friend of mine who is a lot of emotional pain right now. And I wanted to hold her heart in my hand and let Michael heal her. I noticed there was an element of self-interest because this person is a friend of mine, and I couldn’t really get rid of the self-interest; like I was doing this for my own benefit. I don’t quite understand it. I felt I really didn’t belong there because…how am I going to beam Michael’s love into other people if I have a self-interest that seems to take me into selfishness? I did notice that in the process of beaming Michael’s love into other people that when it’s a stranger there’s no problem. But when it’s one of my family members or friends there is self-interest in it. Do you have any comments on that?
Nebadonia: Yes, that this is entirely normal. The stronger the tie you have with this individual, the more you may feel that your own agenda is interceding in what you want for this individual. This is something I would ask you to draw attention away from at this point. Simply state in your mind that it is "no longer important for me to be concerned with how this affects me." Simply ask for Michael’s will to prevail for this individual and for your relationship. You will still feel self-interest for a time. But you are becoming more emotionally detached from this person’s inner pain when you use this idea of wanting your own ideas for this person to prevail. And you will need to notice and do this many times over until your interest in this person is in total alignment with what is truly really in that person’s best interest. You will not know what that is.
In trying to assert your own self-interest you are essentially trying to determine, or you have figured out in your own mind, that what you know is best for this individual. This is not the case. Only the Father knows what is best. So as you sense this self-interest, feel your desire for it to go and simply state clearly in your mind that it is no longer important for you to attain this level of involvement in this individual’s life. Call on me, and I will soften you. When you feel the resistance and interest begin to yield, then you will know that things are moving toward alignment of your Father’s will. Do you understand, my son?
Student: Yes, thanks, Mother. It’s very clear now. I was mistaken that I was polluting the healing process. I don’t think it is. I don’t think it can be.
Nebadonia: I would ask you to eliminate this word from your vocabulary. As you grow more attuned to service, so will your capacity and desire become less self-absorbed and more self-forgetful. If it is your desire that the Father’s will prevail in your life and in your service, then you have no need of concern that any of your own self-interest will upset the apple cart, so to speak. Simply focus on your true heart’s desire for the Father’s will to prevail in this individual’s life in all things and all ways. When you feel the resistance, I will be there to soften, and then more love and healing can proceed from there. And make this simple for yourself. Do you have any other questions or need for clarification, my son?
Student: I can’t think of any at the moment. Just thank you for softening my various feelings and resistances I have inside myself. They are lessening. Thank you very much.
Nebadonia: Be in our peace. You are very much loved, C. We are always with you.
Student: Mother, when you asked us to think of someone who is really suffering and needs help, I thought of a friend of mine who I have been praying for a lot because he always seems to be right at the top of that list. This is a poor individual who is suffering so much and is so hard to get along with that he has no more friends, very much alone. I’ve even had to ask myself why I continue to see him. I came up with the realization that he has a very good heart. He means well. He is a kind of person that if you were stranded alongside the road at 2 AM and everyone else is driving by, he would stop to offer help. I try to keep this in mind because his personality is such that he literally drives people away. I don’t mean this as any kind of a judgment at all, just a description. At one in the same time he is somewhat of a parasite insofar as he for years never seems to give back as much as he takes. At the same time he seems himself as a victim always. He has this terrible reputation of being both a mooch and an insufferable whiner. Yet the suffering is real. So many people think it’s a technique of his to get more, but his suffering is real and intense. Now he’s at a point of terrible health and at war with all the people around him. I’ve been tryi! ng to follow Michael’s advice and just listen, and be there for him without trying to change his behavior or help him see himself as others see him which is always too painful. I don’t know that this is working but to me this is what Michael says is the best thing to do – to listen and to sympathize with his very real pain.
Nebadonia: Describe your experience as Michael took your hands into this person’s heart and the love flowed from your Father into you into this individual.
Student: Very much the same as when I pray for him. I feel it’s doing good, and on a level that he himself is probably not conscious of. Oh, maybe he is conscious of it because in the last couple months he has made some very courageous decisions of suspending certain medicines. He’s very heavily medicated for the pain he’s in constantly. He had a very courageous choice of foregoing some of that medicine and enduring more pain in order to be more clear in his mind. That was a wonderful choice he made. I had a feeling that when he told me that i! t might be the strength I’ve been pouring into him have done him some good; and of course Michael’s counsel encouraging him to be clear of mind in spite of more pain.
Nebadonia: Offer your hands to your Father now, my son. (Pause) Ask for them to be filled with healing, comfort, the capacity to soothe and soften. As you spend time in your stillness with this individual praying, take your hands into this person’s heart, and with all of the fervent desire that you have for this individual for his healing, offer your hands to your Father to be placed into this individual’s heart and ask for these gifts that we bring into you to go right into his pain. And you will not know where the pain is, and it is not necessary. But ask for it to go right into the pa! in and stay there as long as you feel the energy move and your focus and your desire stays strong. I ask you to do this several times a day for him over the next several weeks. Tell him that you are praying for him. Tell him that you are desirous for him to be healed of his pain. That is all you need to do. If you are ready to go into another phase of healing with him in a few weeks, I will address you personally on this matter. Would you be interested in exploring that with us, my son?
Student: Very much, Mother. I think the pain he feels psychically in his relationships with other people is probably even greater than the physical pain he feels. I will pray for him have more wholesome and supportive relationships with his neighbors.
Nebadonia: For now simply pray what I have suggested. More in time will be added. Keep this simple so that the necessary re-weaving of Michael into him can be maximized during this time. Do you understand this, my son?
Student: Yes. Thank you. I will do it.
Nebadonia: And I know your heart is pure to help your brother and your desire is commended. Be in our peace and love, my son.
Student: Thank you, Mother. Thank you for the gift of my wonderful teacher.
Student: Dear Mother Nebadonia, what came up for me was an incident I had in a half-way house with quite a few individuals. It was easy to be comfortable with them, easy to learn to like some of them. I thank you for that and I ask you for any help in handling that type of a larger group.
Nebadonia: The exercise of this evening was to go into the realm where you sense judgment and resentment towards individuals, an individual in particular. The orchestration of group dynamics is something that we will not be addressing for quite a while to come. For now it is important and imperative that your encounters one on one with people be as spiritually fragrant as possible. In order for this to occur, it is our desire for you as our children to learn those fraternal relations that will make you as charming and as harmless and as effective as possible.
It is important that you actively go into the areas where you hold judgments and resentments and to actively seek to disengage yourself from them with our help. I ask you to re-visit this experience and share with me when you area ready what it is you notice or perceive as you ask your Father to come into, and for me to soften, you in how you perceive this individual. Take your time; we are with you. You may speak when you feel you are moved in the direction of understanding and love. (Pause)
Student: There was one individual that came up that was difficult for me that I’ve known for quite a while. It’s a matter of dropping any kind of strong feeling, also an urge at the same time to try to give some kind of feedback or social correction. I just don’t seem to have the skill for it. Over time the hard feeling seems to banish almost like with a child. I feel that I do need help with certain individuals so these resentments do not crop up even for a moment.
Nebadonia: As you re-visit this lesson as you read the transcript, pay close attention to the exercise. Sit in that place of stillness and practice this many times over during the course of the day. I would encourage you to keep this lesson near and dear to your heart over the next several weeks as you strive in your service attempts to become more effective. This will give you deeper skills at ministering that you have not yet tapped into, but you have every potential to fully utilize. You must be free from those attempts to judge other individuals based on what it is that you have perceived, and to be in a place of openness about! who is this individual from your Father’s perspective. What we have shared with you this evening will be a tool for you to take this next step and make you more serviceable to us. Will you now consider this, my son?
Student: Yes, I will. I will try very hard to do that.
Nebadonia: Do you have any other need for clarification?
Student: I think that will be OK for tonight. Thanks.
Nebadonia: There is one area in your mind that is still hovering some question. It is not necessary to voice that. Allow me to enter so that I may loosen some of the rigidity with which you hold this idea. (Permission given, pause) V, my son, you have many wonderful qualities and talents. Use your skills and insights to love, only love. Lessen your interest in assessing. Feel your desire to love and let it outweigh the tendency to evaluate. (Pause) Be in my peace as I weave you in my love.
Student: Mother, I have noted what you have said to each person here tonight. I know that I need to learn from all that you have said to these people. I feel this judgment and resistance very strongly right now in my gut. It’s really rigid and agitated. I feel my heart palpitating strongly. It’s like a part of me is really resisting giving up this judgment. Especially when I see people who are unwilling to change themselves to make their lives better. I may pose my assessments or suggestions. When they don’t get heeded or implemented and when the same cycles keep on an on, I have a hard time with that. I do try and allow myself to come from that place of love. I feel that when I do make suggestions that I am coming from that place of love from what I see and perceive. Obviously, that’s not necessarily the best thing for that individual or individuals.
Nebadonia: You know, my son, that we are taking you into a realm of service ministry that is beyond words.
Student: I see that and can feel that more and more each day each time I feel judgmental and react from that place. I notice when I react from that place, they (whoever I’m speaking to) react from that place. That goes nowhere.
Nebadonia: When you see the behavior that you find distasteful, do not speak, do not suggest. Simply allow your Father and me to guide your hands into that place where that person is in pain and to fill it with love and comfort and healing. You will practice this many, many, many, many, many times over until it becomes instinctive and habitual. You are ready now for this tool to be more fully functioning in your mind. It will aid you tremendously in the future work you do with anyone with whom you come into contact. To practice it in the intimacy of close relationships will give you such insight and strength and allow the focus within yourself to become so bonded to Michael and his will for this individual. And I know you are ready for this now. Are you willing now to turn off the voice and tune into the heart more?
Student: I will definitely try.
Nebadonia: You will have much help by your side as you do this. You are moving into another level of self-control. Where you have control is in allowing yourself led with your heart, the heart of love, that comes from aligning your will with the Father’s will. The human mind does maintain a degree of self-assertion, as you well know. Because it is difficult to lose control, we are simply asking you to shift the focus of where you are in control from speaking what your mind says to speaking with your heart. In speaking with your heart, you can do this silently, effortlessly, joyfully. And know that the results that you see from this will greatly outpace any adherence to the suggestions that you make, which may only go into the mind at a very superficial level and not take good root and grow. When you speak from your heart without words: the language of love being planted in that individual, that is where the seeds can grow in the healthy soil. I know you well understand this, my son. Now it is time for you to practice this until it becomes the most effortless activity of your day.
Student: I remember reading some writing yesterday quoted in the Course of Miracles. It was: "I choose peace, rather than this in every situation I come across." So whenever I feel that pinch of judgmentalness and resistance, I will choose peace, or greater, I will choose love rather than this.
Nebadonia: D, you are being trained now for deeper service and deeper healing ministry. You have asked for this and we are setting the stage. As you find more joy and skill at mastering this technique, as it were, you will find many things will shift, not only in your internal environment, but in those around you. So embrace this opportunity with gusto and know there are many who are beside you to help you achieve great success. Be in my peace, my son.
My children, how it pleases me that you would open yourselves up for these resentment and judgment patterns to be realigned in the ways of love and understanding. You may not yet realize the significance of what it is that you are choosing in participating in these exercises. As I leave you this evening, spend a few moments now in quiet reflection and thankfulness for the opportunities you have been given. Ask for a greater understanding for the significance of these lessons to penetrate into areas of your mind that have still yet to be opened to the truth. Your Father and I will impress more of our ways into you. (Pause)
I bring his peace upon you. I weave my love within you. Share with one another your experiences of beaming your Father’s love into the hearts of your brothers and sisters as those who are in attendance listen to you and minister to you more of our ways. We hold you in the palm of our hands. You are safe always in us. Good evening.
ENDJUNE 21, 2004